some much needed rest

It seems like lately I have not been able to slow down. Whether it is school, work, church or just day to day stuff (wedding plans!!!) it never seems to stop! I know everyone feels the same way. I just wish we all had this remote control for life where all we had to do was push pause for atleast 20 mins so i could just take a hot bath! I am just up to my ears in deadlines, deadlines, deadlines!

I feel at times I just get caught up in the "to do lists" that I forget to stop and feed my spirit. I feel I have been running on empty for awhile. I just yearn to sit and the Lords feet and just drink in his warm, sweet spirit. Like it says in hosea I just feel the Lord alluring me into the desert to speak to me so softly. That is such a sweet picture of our Father.

I just pray that during this Spring Break my heart and your heart can find peace and rest. May we sit back and drink from the cup in His hand. His sweet spirit is so overwhelmning.

Happy Spring Break!

ANTM, anyone?

OK, I have to admit a secret. I love America's Next Top Model. I really do not understand my love for this show at all, but I will just catch myself watching episode after episode cheering my favorite model to the next round of the competition. I watch it so much I even know what my girl Tyra is going to say, "You are still in the running to be America's Next Top Model..." I can hear her now. I have even made Geoff, my fiance, watch it with me. (he is going to kill me because now the world knows) but believe me he is begging for the remote to change the channel. And those who have watched the show you know you have done it too, but we all have practiced our runway walks up and down the hall!

I really do not know what draws me to the show. I really could careless about the drama that plays out between the girls. I find myself leaving the room during the scenes of "who took my redbulls" (lame!) but when it comes to watching them take the actual pictures and the end product, I cannot get enough of it. I love to see the beauty in the pictures they take. Between the model and the photographer I love to see the chemistry of talents work together to make a great photography.

So I do not watch the show for Tyra, or the drama, or even the fabulous Mr. Jay. It's all about the pictures that tell stories. Check out the show sometime, its fun!

thriving vs withering and dying

There are times when I find myself just wanting more. More love, more fun, more just more more more! In my leadership class we were discussing our different strengths we have and how one should express them in our careers and our everyday lives. When I sat there listening to the lecture I realized I am not thriving in what I love to do. The things that I am most passionate about I find myself either putting them off for another day, or thinking there is no possible way I Ashley could ever do such a thing. By having these boundaries placed on me, I am limiting what great things God could and does have in store for me.

I know that I find passion in painting. Picking up a paintbrush and just watching the colors and textures evolve into something beautiful thrills me. I thrive in painting.

I know that I find passion in talking and loving people. I have seen God comfort, move, and restore His people; new, beautiful, hopeful. I thrive in loving and serving people.

I know that I find passion in worshipping. The intimacy I feel with my creator when I am leading people into His kingdom will never be touched. I am assured knowing that He is captivated by me. With all of my flaws, all of my scars, he sees that as beauty. I thrive in worshipping.

I say all of this because I long to thrive. I want my passion to bubble up inside of me where I cannot contain the joy.